Photo: some rights reserved John Ensor
by Mia Vigil
Editor’s Note: This story was originally published in We’Ced Youth Magazine Issue #2
[dropcap]All my life,[/dropcap] I never understood the reasons for adoption. To me, this topic was presented in a negative way and might has well have been compared to abortion. I never saw to realize that adoption change a person’s life in a positive way. That the love, comfort and security that wasn’t given before, could be replaced and given by another family.
Flashback to the day of August 20th, 2012: As my arms are embracing my best friend and as she talks through her tears, she explains to me the hardships of being a young mother and her thoughts towards adoption. With a sincere heart she knew the pain that would come with the leaving of her child, but she explained the opportunities that she couldn’t be able to provide for a better life. As I listened, my mindset began to change from negative to positive. I learned that not only a child will be able to benefit from adoption, but the mother will as well. It is proven that women that women who voluntarily place their children up for adoption, are most likely to have greater educational goals than those with a child According to AdoptionEducation.com. Also, each year there are 20% of unmarried women who put their children up for adoption, and 3% of teenage mother who put their infants up for adoption.
[pullquote_right]Tracy Olson, an adoptive mother of three, ended up adopting from two young mothers through a foster care/adoptive program that she worked with.[/pullquote_right]
Tracy Olson, an adoptive mother of three, ended up adopting from two young mothers through a foster care/adoptive program that she worked with. Usually the adoption process takes 18 months from start to finish, but because of the mothers consent for her to be their child’s guardian the adoption process took much less on this particular occasion. Two out of three of the adoptive children are related. It tends to be fairly usual that children that do end up getting adopted are adopted along with a sibling. In Ms. Olson’s case, she ended up raising more than one child from the same mother. When I asked Ms. Olson about her experience going through the adoption process, she replied, “Overall I’ve had a good experience with it, I would do it again.”
Taylor Dolores, a student intern that works for a foster care agency with teens through the ages of fifteen and a half to twenty one year olds, explains the stereotypes of adoption and how the adoptive parents are chosen if decided to adopt from a foster care agency. When it comes to the stereotypes she explained that with foster care children, they are afraid of being adopted from the fear of losing touch with their biological family. Another main one is hiding the adoption from their children until their certain age.
[pullquote_left]Adoption is a great alternative for a mother or family that wants to provide a better and brighter future for their child. After my recent experience I’ve not only learned about the positive outcomes of adoption, but also to observe the good and bad when it comes to particular topics.[/pullquote_left]
This necessarily does not happen with every adoption though. In fact, a lot of adoptive parents are open to the decision of letting their child see their biological family under the circumstances. For the choice parents trying to adopt there are many particular adoptive agencies that deal with this. After asking Ms. Dolores how exactly adoptive parents are chosen, we found out that first there is a trial to meet the kids, and then afterwards the person willing to adopt can be able to interact with some of the children to get to know them more.
Adoption is a great alternative for a mother or family that wants to provide a better and brighter future for their child. After my recent experience I’ve not only learned about the positive outcomes of adoption, but also to observe the good and bad when it comes to particular topics. I’ve learned that it only takes one person to change a mindset.