I also found out that not many victims come to find help for the specific issue of sexual abuse, often many seek treatment for anger or depression but later find out that they are having these problems because of the molestation issue.

I interviewed my friend Sarah Jackson, who has also been molested by her uncle for three years, from ages nine to 11. At first she didn’t tell anyone because she didn’t want to think about it but what’s in the dark must come to light. In 8th grade she was suppose to go to her aunts’ house for her uncle to “watch her” but she didn’t want to go. Another aunt of hers asked why but Sarah didn’t answer. She asked if she didn’t want to go because of her uncle and began asking her if he was her hurting or touching her. Eventually, Sarah confessed even though she was a little scared. She found out that she wasn’t the only victim her so-called uncle had harmed. There were others. Even though her uncle knows he has done these horrible things to Sarah and others, “he still has the balls to come around and try to shake my hand,” says Sarah.

[pullquote_right]Some other ways people often cope with this issue are drugs and alcohol, acting out in school, over sleeping, having a bad attitude, anger, and same gender sex according to Valerie.[/pullquote_right]

Just as Valerie said, some might isolate their problems or even themselves from others like my friend Sarah did. She didn’t have many friends not because people didn’t like her, she just didn’t want to be around any, stating that she “was angry because [she] felt as if he stole [her] childhood.” As a consequence of this issue, Sarah suffered from depression, loss of confidence and a lot of crying.

Some other ways people often cope with this issue are drugs and alcohol, acting out in school, over sleeping, having a bad attitude, anger, and same gender sex according to Valerie.

A healthy relationship with someone you trust, someone you can go to and they will listen and make you feel that you’re not alone and let you know that it wasn’t you’re fault can be a very important part of coming to terms with a horrible event like this. There are very powerful ways to get over a situation like this. Valerie told me there is a part of your brain that goes off automatically and tells you that something is pleasurable. There is another part of your brain that controls reasoning and logic. So when you have a perp telling you not to tell because then there will be consequences, it can be very confusing.

You’re not in the wrong for not telling but if you are in this situation, try to muster up the courage to tell someone, the perps are the ones who are wrong and sick! They need to be behind bars because what they’re doing is against the law. Good sources for help can be your local church, a school counselor, your physician, or, the best one of all, a good role model. There is also a non-profit organization called CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocates) here in Merced that is “dedicated to providing quality intervention and advocacy services to abused and neglected children.” You can reach them at 209) 722-2272.

Tags: abuse, sexual abuse, spotlight